Reflecting on Dad today, a year on

It was a year ago today that my Dad died and so this morning I am feeling reflective on the year that we have had since he passed away:

  • We have been fortunate to have seen more of Mum than we did when she was caring for Dad. She has joined us on three holidays to the Isle of Wight this year. Joshua adores his Granny so he has loved this bonus time beside the sea with her. She plans to come over for the school Christmas show again this year, although I have had to book her well in advance as she now has a very busy social life!
  • Over the course of 2015, we lost our monthly respite , in February, as the local provision changed from Children to Adult Services but we have fought for, and won, a replacement provision in a neighbouring authority  and the first overnight stay, this weekend, went well. When Joshua was young, and before Dad’s dementia took hold, my parents were our only respite enabling us to go to a friend’s wedding in Scotland  and to see Bruce Springsteen in Holland one memorable weekend, amongst other breaks. So I am sure he would have been relieved to know that we have something regular in place again now.
  • Dad would have been proud of what we have all achieved this year :he would have enjoyed the teenager that Joshua has become and he would have been proud when my husband cycled the Coast to Coast and of his gardening achievements with the produce he has grown in his polytunnel. I like to think that he would have approved of my blog that has been a daily feature of my mornings since 29 May, even though he was a private man. He would have appreciated my involvement in Joshua’s school as a Parent Governor and my more recent attempts to engage with and support more parents from school. I continue to want to make him proud of me.
  • Since Dad died last winter, three baby boys have been born into my cousins’ families and he always loved babies and he would have enjoyed these three new additions. Dad had two daughters , so he would have loved that the family surname is being continued on through my cousin’s son.
  • We lost Yorkshire Grandad in our lives too in September as he sadly died too and so we have two important ladies in our lives who are both widows now. I hope that my experience of losing my own Dad has enabled me to support Yorkshire Grandma and her family more than I would have been able to empathise in the past.
  • A year later, I have had several experiences in nature that convince me that Dad is still looking after us – a rainbow on Father’s Day and blue butterflies and wild flowers where we scattered some of his ashes –  which gives me real comfort and peace.

Today is an important date and one that I will never forget.



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