Deja Vu

I am out of practice at being up at this end of the morning. Joshua was brewing a seizure all evening: I got home at 6.30 to be greeted by Yorkshire Grandma telling me that he had refused to eat his tea, that he was very restless in behaviour , he was wearing his helmet and he was shouting loudly. He had had a small seizure before his tea but clearly they were not over for the night. He had an early bath and seemed to settle down, even asking for bed soon after 8pm. But he did not fall asleep, he was agitated and he continued to jump out of bed four more times, when I would meet him on the stairs, turn him around and steer him back to bed. I tried both cuddling him to sleep and the more stern, kiss and leave approach but neither worked.

On the final occasion, we were going to bed too at 11pm, so I decided to sleep next to him as I was not comfortable with how he was behaving. Even then he was not sure if he liked me there – he would wrap my arm around him tightly – or he would smack me and try to push me away. I think I must have just nodded off, just before midnight, when I woke with a start as he was having a  violent seizure across me. I came too quickly and was able to reassure him. This was clearly what he had been expecting all night yet it did not land until 11.54. Afterwards he was cross and refused to stay in bed, I wrestled with him for a while as he was still trembling, but then I gave in and we came downstairs. He had some Weetabix and watched some Shrek, and I thought that we were all set to be up all night – like we did for two nights running in the bad old days.

However, just now he has taken me by the hand and led me back upstairs as he wanted to return to bed. I have left him to it but I am watching him from downstairs on the baby monitor to ensure that he settles and so far, it seems that he has nodded off, exhausted. After such a rude awakening and a quick rush of adrenalin, I will not be able to get back to sleep straight away but I am mightily relieved if Joshua is able to. This could be a long night.

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