When I collected Joshua last night, at teatime, from respite, he leapt off the settee as soon as he saw me and shouted ” I like you!” and gave me a giant bear hug. He left me in no doubt at all that he was pleased to see me after more than 30 hours apart. The staff reported that he had slept well overnight, just getting up once, and that he had eaten there too, so all would seem to be progressing well. Our next step, more for me rather than for him I suspect, will be two nights away, but I am glad to be taking it step by step as he only had his first stays there in April, so we are not going too slowly.
Joshua was clearly tired, he almost nodded off in the car home and when he arrived back, he went straight through to his Den and snuggled up on the settee with The Show switched on. I made him a welcome tea which he ate greedily and then he had his bath, during which he repeated ” tired” and ” jamas” so an early night was on the cards. It is tiring learning new routines and being with new people, I imagine for Joshua adapting to new respite, must be like starting a new job, and we know how exhausting that is, as you do not totally relax, even though you can maintain a calm appearance for the outside world.
Joshua will only be having a three day week at school, as we will drive to Granny’s house from school on Wednesday, to prepare for the funeral the next day. It may only be when he reaches her house, and her smiling face is not there to greet him, that Joshua truly understands some of what has been going on. Even my mind can fool me from this distance that she is really still around, to be reached on the end of the telephone, so I am really not sure what Joshua can process.Because he deals with the here and now, what is in front of him, he is likely to accept that Granny is missing, even though she has lived in the same house all of his lifetime.
Joshua’s 18th year is full of more change than even I had expected, but I am so thankful that he had his loving Granny in his life for all of his childhood, nobody can take that away from him.