Life and Death

There are all kinds of bereavement therapies available , but I have never heard of Baking Therapy. As a way to relax and distract my mind from over-thinking, I find baking to be very helpful. I create something that is, hopefully, delicious out of raw ingredients and I have to focus fully on the recipes, so it is fully absorbing. Yesterday, I was given some cheese at work as it was leftover from a project. I left work early , potentially for a nap, but instead first of all I made some cheese straws then drove them back to my colleagues in the office, while they were still warm. That was almost as relaxing, and more rewarding, than my planned siesta, as it made my colleagues happy.

It will be my Parent Coffee Morning this morning at school, so I was busy last night preparing brownies and cake for them to enjoy. I have not seen the school Mums for ages, as we did not have a coffee morning in May, as half term got in the way, so it will be good to see them again as April seems forever ago . The last fortnight seems to have been a full lifetime, I just had to double check my calendar then, as I did not believe that Mum could have died just 2 weeks ago today. I am hoping for some hugs and support at the coffee morning, but mainly some distractions, to be able to think about other people and their issues for a change, so that funeral matters can fade into the background for once. It was important for me that I did not cancel the planned event, or delegate it to someone else, as this is something that I enjoy and carrying on indicates that I am still able to function, even though I will not be, nor do I have to be, the life and soul of the morning.

Today, parents who’s children will be joining our school in September have been invited to school for a look around, to meet their teachers and to meet some other parents too. They are having their own event this morning, but I am hoping to meet them too , so that we can make them feel welcome and recruit them to our coffee mornings in the Autumn term. They will be feeling all kinds of emotions today I would have thought, ranging from excitement and relief to get their child at a specialist school, to anxiety and fear about their vulnerable child coming to a new environment. These families are at the start of their journey with our school, whereas we are on the countdown from September, it will be Joshua’s final Autumn term and the start of another emotional roller coaster.

But I am putting that aside for now, my brain and nerves can only handle one change at a time. At the moment I am living just one day at a time, so today is all about the Parent Coffee Morning and about surviving the two week anniversary of Mum’s death.

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